Tuesday is my birthday.
I hadn't thought about what that actually meant until I received a card from none other than Mary telling me everything will be ok. Even then it hadn't sunk in until I reread the card. She was of course, telling me what she had to deal with her first birthday without Uncle Frank. I feel better prepared now to face the fact that Dad won't be calling to send his birthday wishes and share some far fetched story he had read or heard.
My dad would do that alot. He loved to talk about anything, always wanted to share stories. He would often try to recreate comedy bits he heard from comedians. I will say this, his delivery was much better when it was his own story. Repeating another's...not so much. I remember once he called to tell me about a Lewis Black bit. Black was, along with Carlin, one of his favorite comedians. He butchered that bit. I mean destroyed it. I actually had heard the Black special it came from, and let out a laugh at how badly it was delivered. I could do that without him taking offense, because, while he was my dad, he was also one of my closest friends. We busted chops constantly, something that I find I miss more and more as the days slip past.
Come Tuesday, I'll be 33, something that doesn't mean much to me. While it sounds strange, I've started to care less about age and more about time. I remember when people who were older than I am now used to tell me, "Enjoy the time, it goes by faster when your older." I never understood that when I was younger. Who would? A second was a second, minutes and hours never change, they are a set amount of time. But they were right. In a few days, I'll be another year older, and it will have been a month since he passed. Where did those 30 days go?
I was just in Georgia making arrangements and helping my mother out with the tasks that no one should have to face alone. Hell, I was just at the lake last Memorial Day with my future wife telling my youngest to get out of the water because it was only 55 degrees and her lips were starting to lean towards a tint of purple. Where does it go? When we are younger, time seems to drag on. Waiting for something seems to take an eternity. Now, I can't help but look back at everything I've done and question how it all slips past so quickly. Not that I regret any of it, I just wonder where it went.